Life Balance Beyond The ‘Comfort Zone’
Resigning from an organization after 22 years, is somewhat like being a participant at your own funeral. It’s an opportunity for you to be witness to people praise and compliment you; be told how much you will be missed and even see a few emotional tears. In my case, most of the tears were my own.
The past two weeks of my life have been somewhat like that.
A few weeks ago, I decided to call quits on an amazing career with an apparel manufacturing giant. I had two years left on my contract, but reaching the end of my 58th year, I was looking for something more than heading to that finale and fading off into the sunset.
I feel (I am sure many people at my age would agree) that I still have more miles left in these wheels. I still feel the hunger for achievement and the desire to continue doing what I love doing. The thought of building and running apparel manufacturing plants, reducing their impact on the planet, and creating new and innovative ways to make beautiful clothing still excites me. I have also firmly believed that if we are not ‘growing’ as individuals, regardless of age, we go into a state of decay, and start ‘dying.’
Therefore, I have taken on a new adventure. One that will yank me out of my comfort zone and into an unknown environment. One that will give me the rush of being able to create a whole new manufacturing structure and put to test all the knowledge and experience I have garnered over the past 22 years.
One of the questions I get asked regularly is, “don’t you want to retire and enjoy the things you love to do?” I find this quite sad actually. This implies that many people have either postponed or haven’t been able to balance their life in a way that allows them to enjoy their passions — hobbies or ‘live beyond the hamster wheel’ of their work life.
For me, the concept of ‘Work-Life Balance’ has been something I have refuted for many years. I hate that term. It implies that work and life are two different things. Is ‘work’ simply the things we do, so we can do the things we love? Is it something we suffer through for 30+ years to be able to finally live?!
Many moons ago, I worked as a stockbroker. While it wasn’t ‘Wolf on Wall Street’ rather ‘Jackal on York Street,’ I regularly worked 18 hour-days and sometimes went on cycles of work, entertain, shower, work, with barely any sleep or time at home. This frenzied and unhealthy lifestyle contributed in no small way towards the ultimate demise of my first marriage.
This was a shock to me. How could working hard for what I treasured the most, my family, end up in my losing it all? This was the eye opener. This was the shock my system needed.
At 35, I took stock of my life. I had two amazing young sons, a career that held potential, but needed a revamp, and a life that had pretty much fallen apart at the seams.
I made changes. I won’t bore you with the details, but the most important change I made was to decide that the way I was working/entertaining and neglecting what was important in my life had to change. My ‘life’ was what was important. My ‘life’ was not a side act, it was the main show. I needed to treat it as such.
I started utilizing my leave. Sri Lanka has the most number of public holidays in the world, and if you use your leave wisely, there are many long breaks you could get by combining leave and stitching holidays together.
I started to spend time traveling with my boys. We didn’t have much money in those days, but I borrowed vehicles or hitched rides and travelled as much as we could through what was a fragmented and war-torn Sri Lanka. This gave me far more quality time with my sons.
We did simple things like cook and clean our apartment together. We read books and sat on two mattresses that doubled up as our sofas during the day, watching documentaries. We found time to do simple, but important things that created a bond that I am proud to say, stands to this day.
In 2001, I switched jobs to one that offered me significantly more in the way of resources and opportunities to add value to my life.
At my final interview, my ‘not yet’ boss asked me the question, “is there anything we should know about the way you work?” my answer was, “Yes. I will take every single day of leave that is due to me every single year I work, and I will probably take a few days of no pay leave as well.”
My incredulous boss to be, rapidly took this note down on his pad, and I wasn’t quite sure how he was going to react. In fairness, in the twenty-two years I served this organization, this has never been brought up as an issue. In fact, it was brought up as an example of ‘life balance’ on many an occasion.
I hope my track record of building and running organizations speaks for itself, but what I am most proud of is that during this time, I was also able to follow my passion for photography, travel and adventure; to embark on epic journeys up mountains, jungles and to far off places; ride bicycles through and walk the length and breadth of our island home; write blogs, publish books, and spend time with my sons as they grew into two fine young men, and truly lived to the fullest, not feeling like I had deprived my family or myself of a ‘life.’
This has also been the motive for my vocal advocacy of ‘Work from Anywhere,’ which we practice diligently at our workplace.
I have already written in length about my recent experience with surgery. But what’s worth re-mentioning are my thoughts and feelings moments before being anaesthetised — when I reflected on my life to that point, I was happy. I had no regrets.
How would you look back on yours if you potentially only had moments left to live? Have you spent this life you have been gifted, ‘living’ or merely, getting from one day to the next?
One could say I was fortunate I had the resources to live my dreams. It’s true. But none of this came easy. It was hard earned, as was my freedom to live the life I wanted to.
The choice is yours. Work your ‘ass off’ for a bulk of your young and healthy life, to ‘live’ in your autumn years? Or live every day, and every opportunity, balancing the priorities in your life with passion and zest?!
